Does the thought of resisting support seem to make you think, "No way, I love when people help me." But then you take a pause and question this statement of yours!
If so, you're not alone. Let's dive into ways to understand if you are resisting support in your life!
The first way to know if you are resisting support:
We all do it. We think we can just figure it out or we can take action and do it ourselves.
Take for example you get back from the grocery store with lots of bags and your partner or roommates or a family member wants to help you but you say, no’ I got it. Even though no you don’t have it. There are a lot of bags and a bunch of steps and you wish you wouldn’t have to take them all up there.
Controlling is a big one! It's hard to let go, just breathe and move on. But we can do it!
Take a deep breath with me on this.
I’ve talked about this before (I heart images and ideas of Superwoman and Wonder Woman as I talked about this in last week’s podcast). Therefore if you’re anything like me you love doing it all. You thrive on busy to-do lists and making things happen creatively. In fact you think you excel with a lot on your plate. This is what I thought up until about a year ago.
I used to think the busier I was, the better! But then life made me slow down and clear my plate. Now I have a brand new perspective.
Here’s why asking for help is not a sign of weakness.
You can actually see it as a strength.
The more we ask for help, the easier it gets. The easier it gets and the more we do it, the more we feel a deeper sense of connection and community and fulfillment in our lives.
We all need help throughout our lifetime. Yet it is just as important to give help as part of our support system.
What charity do you support or where can you go volunteer to bring down some of the silos?
There is an amazing Ted Talk by Michelle Sullivan that if you like this information you may want to watch. The title of her talk is Asking for Help is a Strength.
It’s easy to focus on other people and see where they need help and go out of our ways to find a solution for them or try to figure out their problem. Maybe it’s because that’s what we do all day long.
It feels good and it fills us up for the moment. But in the long term what fills us up is fixing ourselves, diving into the knowledge and helping ourselves.
When we dive into ourselves and what we want, it might mean asking for support to do this.
On the podcast I give an example of how I prioritized myself and I had to ask for support.