Today we are talking about 5 Reasons Your Life Looks Different Than You Thought.
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It’s a little confusing. Your life is pretty great. It’s fun. It’s exciting and you are doing things you never dreamed of doing. You are responsible for budgets and teams that probably should be above your pay grade.
Plus there are so many hot guys out there to date.
So what’s the deal; why do you feel happy with life yet it doesn’t really look like what you thought it would look like at this age?
At some point and I’m not exactly sure what point that is but you’ll know it when it happens. You realize you are older than you thought but don’t feel like that number. And secondly, your life doesn’t look like you thought it would at that age.
Can you relate? Am I making sense? I hope so...
Why do you think you are content with your life yet a little freaked out by your age as well as what you “thought” your life might look like right now?
Let’s dive into this --
There are 5 different reasons, I’ve found, that your life looks different than you thought it would.
Life is good my friend! You find yourself traveling to cool places; lounging on fabulous beaches and then backpacking through (insert your cool hike here).
You have the option to go jet-setting to see your friends via trains or planes, your pick. You get to go back to college for the alumni games each year.
With all of these great life experiences what more could you want in you life? You are a hot cool chic with nothing more to do than fit another yoga class or crossfit class into your work schedule.
Well, listen it’s good and you are all good. Way to go and I am proud of you. And I hope you are proud of yourself. If you don’t feel proud of yourself, check out my blog - #1 secret to embracing your life. You need this, especially if you are in your 20s/early 30s. Make sure you are proud of yourself first!
Being content is one of the best feelings in the world.
There is an old quote that says “If you have a garden and a library, you have everything you need.” – Cicero
Well maybe it can also be “if you have a good paycheck, great friends and the ability to travel, you have everything you need.”
Is this true? Is this everything?
If you are content yet find a little bit of a nagging voice that change might be something you are interested in down the road it’s all good.
Be open and listen to it with an open heart.
Just know if there is a soft, nagging feeling that you want to put down roots somewhere or start a different direction of your life , that’s good too.
Being content could be why your life looks different than you thought it would because you are actually content with having the flexibility to do whatever you want in your life and that is great. It’s powerful and its empowering. Own that!!
You’ve realized that college was worth it yet it takes a while to pay this shit down.
It takes longer than you thought to pay off that student loan, longer than you thought to pay off that car loan or longer than you thought to get your masters degree and keep paying for it. Holy smokes! Yet we are grateful that we could find loans to help us get through the final years of college.
You’ve got a good paying job that you can throw a bunch of money at your loan and you see the end in site. Good for you! Keep going.
But maybe you feel like it’s never going away … between bachelorette parties, weddings and the girls trips, you can’t get that loan down if your life depended on it!
Or you find it hard to save money living in the big city,
You must read the quick, short story written by David Bach, The Latte Factor; Why You Don’t have to be Rich to Finish Rich.
In his book, David tells a story that is very relatable. It’s about a woman living her dream life in NYC yet as her 20s start to whiz by she realizes she may never be able to afford that dream vacation. She may never be able to afford anything more than her crazy New York City rent, daily lunch and trips on the subway.
It is a great reminder of the many little ways we can make money work for us and not against us. Every day our decisions can make or break the bank in the long run.
I highly recommend this book because it’s a fun and easy read about a life that is very relatable. Plus the way he tells the story is easy to incorporate into your own life.
Whether you are close to paying off debt or still have some ways to go, keep focusing and you will do it.
Debt can feel like we are staying in one place because it limits our options until it goes away. Is that a reason your life is looking different than you thought it would?
Two cars, a house with a white picket fence and 2.5 kids isn’t necessarily the American Dream anymore.
Can you agree that the American Dream now might be to be portable, have a flexible job and give back where you can? A recent survey said that 71% of people wanted to achieve financial independence as their American Dream. A common definition of financial independence means no longer having to work because you have enough savings.
Years ago it was to own a home, get married, have children, and be able to retire somewhere nice in your 60s. Now, people are traveling and incorporating a lot of their bucket list living into their life before they retire. In fact a lot of people are incorporating these bucket list moments before they get married, buy a house, or grow roots somewhere. It is a bit of reversal living now.
Yet family still fuels us and people, community and connections are the most important things. And I have this saying hanging up in my closet which I read almost every day and that is “Remember to slow down and treasure the small things. Because when you look back one day it's the small things that count.”
Yes, it is the small things with the most important people that are the most meaningful.
We get it now. Make the most of your life today; don't put it off until tomorrow.
This may not be what you saw at home or during your childhood.
In your 20s you figured your life would include the house, the marriage and the kids. Therefore you didn’t really think this is what you would be doing now, yet you love it.
Neuroscientists believe that due to what they call “chunking,” life seems to go by faster as an adult. Studies show that when you are a child you are constantly learning new things and therefore creating new memories. You are changing grades, changing schools, advancing in your reading, changing sports teams, etc. Yet as an adult, you might buy a house and like your job therefore nothing dramatic changes for the next 5 years.
This is where chunking comes into play. Your brain tends to bulk together these time periods that look and feel the same way. If you are not experiencing change or any learning the brain brings it all together and it could feel the same. Hence a reason why two to three years go by and you can’t recall specifics and it seemed to go fast.
When you are getting older this starts to happen and time almost feels like it is speeding up.
Therefore if you wanted to get something accomplished but didn’t focus on it, then 2 years might have “sped by” and you have not put effort towards your goal yet.
Life is literally going by and you did not focus on what you wanted or the outcomes. This can be a reason why your life looks different than you thought it would. Because you are not focusing on what you want your life to become. Only doing and going through the motions of everyday life.
Focusing on what you want in your life and for your life can be the next thing you need.
Reason number 5 could be a big one And its easy-ish for me to talk about because it isn’t my life you are in. It’s yours.
It's also a little easy for me to talk about because I am a meeting and event planner. Someone who plans to make plans for a living. LOL.
You’ve got to make plans.
I have some rules to live by in terms of planning and here they are.
Rule #1 - Schedule down time for yourself.
So many people fight against this! We think its odd to hang out with ourselves. That is SO not true! How do you get to know someone? By spending time with them! Therefore how do you get to know yourself? By spending time with your thoughts, feelings, interests and hobbies.
Consider your wish granted to get to know yourself better than anyone you could possibly know. Because you spend the longest time with yourself in this lifetime!
Go to the movies, go shopping, go to the beach, go for a drive. Permission granted!
Rule #2 - Revisit what you want often.
How many people talk about morning routines? Are you over this conversation? Well it could be the most important routine you give yourself. Show up for what you want in the morning. Look over your lists and revisit what you want to see come into your life in the next five to ten years. A few of my favorite planners to write in during your morning routine are:
The list goes on and on but hopefully you love one of those.
Remember to block your schedule and focus on what you want daily.
Rule #3 - Be grateful for what you have.
Although it took me years to complete, I finally finished my first Five-Minute journal.
They say the five-minute journal is “your secret weapon to focus on the good in your life, become more mindful, and live with intention.”
The book itself is small enough to take with you on the road when you are traveling. It has enough pages in it for half of a year. Somehow it still took me a few years to complete one book. Yet I did it!
This little book helped me go from always looking for the negative to redirecting all the amazing people, moments and treasures in my life. By being grateful for what you have in your life and who you are, you can move onto what you want to bring into your space in a much more giving and loving way.
Being grateful allows you to love your life and then welcome in more good. It also helps you to understand when other things in your life are ready to leave your life. If they do not serve your life's purpose anymore, we can let them go.
Whew, we just ran through the five reasons your life looks different than you thought. Does any one these reasons resonate with you? I want to hear from you! Let me know. If you like this conversation please let me know what else you want to hear by sending me a note @ [email protected]. I want to hear from you!
Think about where you want to focus on improving your planning skills and what areas of your life you want to change to better serve you.
If you want help with planning better in your life, stay tuned and keep coming back. We have more in store for you in the weeks to come!
And please share this with a friend! We are growing our community and want more like-minded women to join us.
Today’s episode is brought to you by Easy Breezy Egg Freezy: A Guide to Deciding if Egg Freezing is Right for You. If you are over 30 and unsure about having children but still want the option - check out the free resources for you and the book at www.eggfreezingbook.com. That’s www.eggfreezingbook.com.
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